Rants and Raves

Opinion, commentary, reviews of books, movies, cultural trends, and raising kids in this day and age.

Sunday, May 03, 2009

And speaking of pictures...

We had an exchange at the office the other day, which I'm still chuckling over, for reasons I can't quite explain.

The weather outside was foul, and our town is still rationing sewer use. The durn college sports auditorium electronic billboard is flashing, "Yellow is mellow, brown flush it down," if that gives you an idea.

At any rate, I got an email from my father with pics of my wife and kids. They're staying with my parents on the east coast while the emergency lasts.

(I suspect my boy became instantly popular in school after telling his new schoolmates there were no toilets in our town, "Ewwww gross!")

At any rate, I was telling a female colleague in the office about the pics, and how the sun is shining on the bay and everything looks so beautiful.

"I don't want to see them," she said grumpily.

"Damn she looks good!" I remarked.

"Steve!" she said, shocked.

"Hey, that's my wife I'm talking about."

What can I say? Nine years and I'm still crazy about my wife.

There was a time that was considered shocking. The Polish King Jan III Sobieski, who led the Polish-German forces that relieved the siege of Vienna by the Turks, had a wife Maryszenka. Their relationship was the scandal of Europe at the time.

You see, one doesn't know how to put this delicately, but the king was known to be in love with his wife.

That just wasn't done!

Polish popular movies still make fun of this. I saw one in which foreign ambassadors come to the palace to meet with the king, and the palace staff find him in a corner enjoying a little slap-and-tickle with the queen.

Since the king was often away on campaign in those turbulent times, they wrote to each other a lot. It's a pity their correspondence hasn't been translated, I'm told it deserves a place among the masterpieces of delicately erotic literature.

"The act of defending any of the cardinal virtues has today all the exhilaration of a vice."

G.K. Chesterton


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